Empathy and Humankind

According to its website,

The Royal Society of Arts in London.

Image via Wikipedia

For over 250 years the Royal Society for the encouragement of Arts, Manufactures and Commerce (RSA) has been a cradle of enlightenment thinking and a force for social progress.  Our approach is multi-disciplinary, politically independent and combines cutting edge research and policy development with practical action.

One of the RSA’s most interesting, and I daresay successful projects, is the animation of excerpts of lectures by prominent thinkers.

In the RSA animation below, economist Jeremy Rifkin talks about the soft-wiring of humans for empathy.  The excerpt is very rich with ideas and optimism for expanding the human family.  In it, he defines empathy as the acknowledgement of death and reaffirmation of life.  Many early political thinkers identified the fear of death and the concomitant instinct for self-preservation as driving forces for enlarging the family to society and cultures in order to protect individuals from the brutality, aggression and violence of human life.  What is quite interesting here is that starting with the discovery of mirror neurons, Rifkin takes the human coming-to-terms with death beyond nation-state consciousness and theological consciousness to something more universal and inclusive.

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Web Clip: Jonathan Haidt on “The New Science of Morality”

Web Clip: “The New Science of Morality”, from www.edge.org:

“Behavioral scientists routinely publish broad claims about human psychology and behavior based on samples drawn entirely from Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich and Democratic societies.”  The acronym there being WEIRD. “Our findings suggest that members of WEIRD societies are among the least representative populations one could find for generalizing about humans. Overall, these empirical patterns suggest that we need to be less cavalier in addressing questions of human nature, on the basis of data drawn from this particularly thin and rather unusual slice of humanity.”

As I read through the article, in terms of summarizing the content, in what way are WEIRD people different, my summary is this: The WEIRDer you are, the more you perceive a world full of separate objects, rather than relationships, and the more you use an analytical thinking style, focusing on categories and laws, rather than a holistic style, focusing on patterns and contexts.

Now, let me state clearly that these empirical facts about “WEIRD-ness”, they don’t in any way imply that our morality is wrong, only that it is unusual. Moral psychology is a descriptive enterprise, not a normative one. We have WEIRD chemistry. The chemistry produced by Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich, Democratic societies is our chemistry, and it’s a very good chemistry. And we have every reason to believe it’s correct. And if a Ayurvedic practitioner from India were to come to a chemistry conference and say, “Good sirs and madams, your chemistry has ignored our Indian, you know, our 5,000-year-old chemistry,” the chemists might laugh at them, if they were not particularly polite, and say, “Yeah, that’s right. You know, we really don’t care about your chemistry.”

But suppose that same guy were to come to this conference and say, “You know, your moral psychology has ignored my morality, my moral psychology.”  Could we say the same thing?  Could we just blow him off and say, “Yeah, we really don’t care”?  I don’t think that we could do that. And what if the critique was made by an American Evangelical Christian, or by an American conservative?  Could we simply say, “We just don’t care about your morality”?  I don’t think that we could.

Read or watch Jonathan Haidt‘s lecture,  at this edge conference, “The New Science of Morality”

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“Divorce is costly. The settlement need not be.”

Stephanie West Allen at idealawg has excerpted from an interesting opinion piece in today’s online edition of The Christian Science Monitor:

[...] three underlying problems will remain – and it is these problems, and not the adjustments that might be needed in alimony or custody statutes, that make divorce a disaster for many families.First, the cost of litigating alimony and child custody issues imposes an unmanageable burden on many couples and their children.

Second, choosing to litigate these issues means relinquishing control to courts over what we hold most dear – our children and our financial survival.

Third, divorce litigation almost invariably ratchets up antagonisms to a point where children get caught in the crossfire.

The piece is by David Hoffman, a lawyer, mediator, and arbitrator at Boston Law Collaborative, LLC, who teaches mediation at Harvard Law School.  His assertions are based on the following research:

Two years ago I compared the costs of [three] processes – litigation, mediation, and collaborative law – in divorces in a study published in the University of Missouri-Columbia School of Law’s Journal of Dispute Resolution. The cases involved affluent families with a median net worth of about $2 million.

The disparity in costs was striking.

[...]

In the mediated divorce cases, the combined cost for both parties for legal fees and mediation fees was $15,671. In the litigated cases, the data showed a median cost for legal fees that was ten times higher – a breathtaking $155,492. The combined cost for both parties in collaborative law cases was $39,445 – approximately 25 percent of the cost of litigation.

The point about the disparity in costs is unassailable.  To continue with his analysis, it can also be seen that the combined cost for both parties in collaborative family law cases as two-and-one-half times higher than the combined cost for both parties in mediation.  It should also be noted that the figure used for mediation includes both legal fees and mediation fees; the cost for mediation alone can be expected to drop, in some cases quite significantly, if only the mediation fees (without attendant legal fees) is taken as the measure.

Finally, there is the matter of personal autonomy and self-determination:

In addition to cost savings, mediation and collaborative law processes enable the clients to retain control over the outcome. The hallmark of these processes is that they foster amicable, creative, and lasting solutions.

Most important, in divorces with children still at home, mediation and collaborative law can protect the kids. Research shows that parental conflict is a more robust predictor of bad outcomes for children than divorce. And interviews with adult children of divorce provide anecdotal evidence that kids endure divorce far better when their divorcing parents collaborate.

Posted in Family Law, Family mediation, mediation | Tagged , | 1 Comment

On “non-alternative ADR”

From a Globe and Mail editorial on July 21, 2010 about B.C.’s proposals to update its family law statute:

[...]

To a considerable extent, family law is about family breakdown and the disagreements that follow. No one thinks that courts of law are the ideal place to deal with these matters. But though the concept of alternative dispute resolution has been in currency since the 1980s, many of the attempts at it have still been very much inside the court context – what might be called “non-alternative alternative dispute resolution.”

The white paper presented on Tuesday by Michael de Jong, the Attorney-General of B.C., sets a forthright goal of dispute resolution processes that are genuinely independent of the courts. It says that the commencement of a lawsuit should no longer be the “presumptive” or “implied” starting point for sorting out the consequences of a separation of spouses. The principal device proposed to displace that default mode is to require lawyers to certify that they have presented to their clients the full spectrum of other ways to settle their differences, before they resort to judges by filing papers in court, thus starting litigation.

In Ontario, subsidized family mediation is offered to low-earners in a number of jurisdictions.  In Ottawa, for many years now, couples in this category had access to roughly an hour of on-site family mediation on days when they attended court, and to three or so two hour off-site family mediation sessions.Since April 1, low-earning Ottawans can only avail themselves of subsidized on-site family mediation.  Or, in other words, the starting point for working out arrangements of spouses (and often, parents) who separate is a legal action if you are among those with low incomes.  Exactly the situation that B.C. is seeking to remedy was reintroduced in Ottawa until March 31, 2011 when the Ontario government’s contracts with on-site mediators ends.  Clearly, a retrogressive step from a government that prides itself on “…moving forward with the changes needed to make family matters easier to resolve and more affordable for Ontario families.”

If you live in Ottawa and you think the less advantaged in our city need greater access to alternatives to sorting out arrangements following marriage breakdown, consider writing to the Attorney General of Ontario at:

Hon. Christopher Bentley
Ministry of the Attorney General
11th Floor
720 Bay Street
Toronto, Ontario M5G 2K1

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Happy July 4th, 2010

Listen to Walt Whitman’s voice on July 4th weekend:

This is a 36-second wax cylinder recording of what is thought to be Whitman’s voice reading four lines from the poem “America.” For more information on this recording, see Ed Folsom, “The Whitman Recording,” Walt Whitman Quarterly Review, 9 (Spring 1992), 214-16.

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The State of Mediator Impartiality

tricycle, the Buddhist Review,  introduced a new feature, “Dear Abbey Dharma”, in its Spring 2010 issue to offer advice to readers’ toughest Dhamma questions.  The column is authored by Sylvia Boorstein, a  psychotherapist and founding teacher of Spirit Rock Meditation Center in California.

Her first column is now on-line; it deals with a meditation teacher’s need to keep a balanced view on politics.  I started wondering what it would read like if the words ‘Buddhist’ and ‘Buddhism’ were replaced by mediation; if teacher was replaced by mediation supervisor or colleague.  Here’s the entire text.

Dear Abbey Dharma, In my lifetime of professional work in Canadian social service, I have gone from being left-leaning to Social Conservative. I don’t find a place for myself in any Western Buddhist sangha where being politically left is the norm. Even my current dharma teacher spews out hateful speech against just about anyone and everything on the right side of the spectrum. I have a hard time listening to a Buddhist teacher going on about how much he despises George W. Bush or Sarah Palin or people like me. No one but me even notices, or at least is affected by it. How can I remain part of the Western Buddhist community under these conditions?—Up North

Dear Up North, I would also have several reasons for not trusting the wisdom of a Buddhist teacher who, as you say, “goes on about how much he despises” or “spews out hateful speech” about any particular group of people. My first reason for not trusting his wisdom is his manner of speech, which is abusive. Another is the ignorance shown by stereotyping groups of people, such as “the right” or “the left,” as categorically unworthy. Another reason is the teacher’s apparently fixed attachment to a view.

I think it is difficult these days to keep a balanced mind about politics. Morality, decency, and kindness (fundamental spiritual virtues) have been claimed by both the right and the left as their core values. Political opponents are presented as enemies rather that adversaries, villains rather than committed civil servants with differing views. The issues— world peace, planetary survival— can be frightening. When I am frightened, I have trouble remembering that my view is just a view and that I could be wrong.

I think that calling oneself a Buddhist implies a dedication to non-greed, non-hatred, and non-delusion—a dedication that certainly transcends political stance. It would be wonderful if our sanghas welcomed political diversity and used practices of skillful speech to explain our opinions to one another. In situations that do not feel combative to me, I can work collegially. I can modify my position to accommodate others. I can recognize situations in which an attachment to a particular view has kept me from realizing a larger truth. What if we, as Buddhists in communities, were a model for the world political community?

You can make the substitutions for yourself.  What do you think?  It pretty much works for me, except perhaps for the last paragraph.  But I’m not attached to that view!

Posted in Politics, mediation, mindfulness | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

President Obama on the Birthday of Aung San Suu Kyi

I wish to convey my best wishes to Aung San Suu Kyi, the world’s only imprisoned Nobel Peace Laureate, on the occasion of her 65th birthday on June 19.  Her determination, courage, and personal sacrifice in working for human rights and democratic change in Burma inspire all of us who stand for freedom and justice.  I once again call on the Burmese government to release Aung San Suu Kyi and all political prisoners immediately and unconditionally and to allow them to build a more stable, prosperous Burma that respects the rights of all its citizens.  Towards this end, I encourage all stakeholders in Burma to engage in genuine dialogue towards national reconciliation, a vital step to set Burma on a more positive course for the future.

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Aung San Suu Kyi Turns 65 June 18th

As Myanmar prepares for its upcoming elections, a sense of concern and tension is in the air. Many fear that there will once again be political unrest, resulting in widespread arrests from election-related crackdowns. Moreover, contributing to the anxiety is the anticipated release of democracy leader and co-founder of the National League for Democracy (NLD) Daw Aung San Suu Kyi, who has endured unofficial detention and has been held under house arrest for about 15 years in Yangon.

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The Oil Spill (more, regrettably)

Please notice the service station where this picture was taken:

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We’re All Visitors

The Moment

Margaret Atwood

The moment when, after many years
of hard work and a long voyage
you stand in the centre of your room,
house, half-acre, square mile, island, country,
knowing at last how you got there,
and say, I own this,

is the same moment when the trees unloose
their soft arms from around you,
the birds take back their language,
the cliffs fissure and collapse,
the air moves back from you like a wave
and you can’t breathe.

No, they whisper. You own nothing.
You were a visitor, time after time
climbing the hill, planting the flag, proclaiming.
We never belonged to you.
You never found us.
It was always the other way round.

Margaret Atwood

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